O vácuo

Porque ele me fez assim.

Porque o tempo me criou.

Porque nunca mais o encontrei.

Porque nunca mais fui assim.

Porque eu notei que vivia, passei a ser diferente.

Porque eu tive medo de mim, passei a ser perigoso.

Porque eu não amei, odeio-me a mim próprio.

Desde a noite do limoeiro ate ao pássaro do rei.

Desde que nunca te vi, logo escuso de te procurar.

Porque sou um miúdo, por dentro já cresci até ao pique.

Porque eu sou sádico, masoquista, e cínico para com as pessoas, a minha negatividade rasgou um sorriso de carnificina pelo meu rosto.

Porque eu choro e grito por dentro, por fora falo e rio como um maníaco.

Com este sorriso encontrei o meu mundo, mas a sua descoberta fez com que ele caísse.

Porque com estas metáforas todas, peço apenas ajuda.

Porque eu tenho objectivo de viver, eu quero-me matar.

Eu não gosto de mim.

E tu?

Seriously?

Ok, first of all, let's start with good old fashioned rants on something that just merely fucked up my patience so badly, I just felt like putting it here, for some god damn reason.

Ok, so, recently, yeah, I've had the FUCKING SECOND break-up with this person, and I don't know why the second, maybe I just gave in to stupidity to actually START AGAIN.

First topic: start-overs, or aka, "second chance."

We all had this moment, where we broke up with this person that probably was the first, or we had a good time, a good sexy time(giggidy~), and we feel bad for breaking up and they are having a hard time going by, they all whiny and shit(in my case, she was drunk ._.)...OH THE FUCKING JOY.

Being the naive, emotionally aware stupid motherfucker I am, I actually started over, hopefully shit could get better, and whatnot, maybe, I could get a good time out of this all...yeah right.

Second topic: Post-breakup rules.

The rules are quite simple for a man.

DON'T. FLIRT. AT ALL.

And weeeell...yeah. I did. But not like flirt for flirt, just confort begging flirt, and she didn't know...neh. I spoke to a friend of mine using a comparative which was somewhat like this:

"The results for the investment on that relationship would be the same if I invested a relationship with you."

And of course, she's a mutual friend of hers, and she must have said something of the lines of...

"HEY! Did you know that Will(me) is going to invest on a relationship with me? 8DD"

she must have been somewhat like...

"WHAT?! I'M GOING TO KILL HIM RARARARAR."

...So yeah. I just got fucked over. Not only that, she was pissed off that I broke up too, and her prespective was that

So yeah, I tried to explain I didn't flirt with her, and actually flirted with some other girl.

But it doesn't matter much.

I don't have morals. I hate them. It restrains me from being me, I'm sorry people get hurt from it but it's just me.

So, everyone that's got a problem, can really, FUCK OFF!!

William,

Over and out.